Navigating complicated relationships is a difficult task and, if you have feelings for a friend, it gets even more complicated – as one poor young lady found out.
The unnamed 23-year-old woman posted a desperate plea for advice in the relationships section of Reddit explaining the whole situation.
She explains that she and Paul, also 23, have been best friends for years and have “always flirted” but he has always been in serious relationships with other people.
“I’ve been his shoulder to cry on throughout it all. Our friendship has always been strictly platonic with moments of slip-ups,” she wrote.
Three years ago, when Paul broke up with one of his girlfriends, he turned to the Reddit poster for comfort.
“He leaned in to kiss me when he stopped and basically ran out of my house saying: ‘I can’t do this. It will ruin everything between us.’
“He didn’t speak to me for a week and got back with his girlfriend thereafter. I told him in person I couldn’t do it anymore and I felt used.
“He responded ‘okay’ and went on his marry way. He didn’t even care and I was crushed.”
Two months later, she received a message from him saying how much he loved her and how she was his best friend – that he never meant to hurt her.
But the next year, when he was single, they ended up taking their relationship to the next level.
She said: “Well, he kept pushing se x and we ended up sleeping together. When I went to fall asleep, he grabbed me and said out of all things, he would miss me in his arms.”
The woman then explains that the next day, he acted like nothing had happened and said he had just been drunk, couldn’t remember anything and that they should just go back to being friends.
We can understand how she would be confused. She explained the whole story to users on Reddit, but they didn’t do much to reassure her.
gonzoimperial commented: “You’re his safety girl. He’s going to keep doing this until he’s 35 and then he might settle for you. Please don’t do this.”
isayfiesta: “He’s basically saying you’re nice, but not great enough for him to put in some effort to make it work.
“He’ll likely turn on the charm and tension again next time he wants your attention/se x, but once he gets what he wants he’ll be back to his excuses of why you guys won’t work out.”
If she was hoping for reassurance and for people to tell her they would live happily ever after, we’re betting she was crushed.